Image courtesy of Flatrock.org

Lately, I’ve been feeling strange. Have you ever felt like you were rushing along in your life? Trying to achieve certain things, or get to certain places? I’m not sure how to explain it, except that when you pause for a split second you notice that you were rushing. I’ve felt this way at certain times in my life–where I’ve noticed the rush. And had no idea why I was rushing. I mean, what IS the rush? I suppose everyone wants to get somewhere or to someone in their life. But why, for some of us, is there this real need to get it faster, sooner, NOW?

I can’t answer any of those questions. Not even for myself. But lately, I’ve stopped for a second. Not because I’ve paused. Because I’ve been rushing, rushing, rushing, and then SMACK! I’ve rushed right into a brick wall. Ok, it might not be brick. It might be climbable. But its made me stop, stop for longer than I have in ages, and its made me think. Because I have to.

When I was in university, I went to a therapist for a little while. I remember asking her about this ‘rushing’, this weird need at 20 years old to have everything meaningful RIGHT NOW. It felt as if I didn’t have any time, when all I had was time. It didn’t make sense. It still doesn’t, but I remember what she told me. She said that I should imagine myself, just picture ‘me’ in my mind, and give ‘her’ the things she wants and/or needs–either a symbolic version of that event or whatever, or the actual thing. To be honest, it works. Well, it usually works. This time…not so much.

There are LOTS of things I love doing, things that I enjoy, things that relax me. But they only manage to relax me for a finite amount of time. Then everything that was on the back-burner comes whooshing back up to the front-burner, and I’m not really any better off than I was before. I need to find a way to release the worry, stress, and pressure that floats around in the ol’ noggin. I’ll report back if and when I find it. In the meantime–here is a list of tips I’ve found about how to ‘slow down’. And here’s another about reducing stress through ‘mindfulness’. I’ll give it all a go!

Courtesy of cbt-partnership.org

Quite coincidentally, my mum sent me an email forward this VERY day, that was really relevant to all of this. I won’t repeat it word for word, but it was basically–All my life I was dying to achieve this and that, and now that I’m dying I realise I never really lived. It was a list of all these major life moments this dying person rushed to get to. I’m not dying, but I think I AM forgetting to live life and enjoy it while I can. I don’t understand why that can be difficult sometimes, but I’m going to do my best to enjoy everything from now on.

Advertisements

3 responses »

  1. MoVo says:

    We are so oddly in sync! I have a very awesome colleague taking a course right now at work specifically focused on mindfulness, intended for all but geared toward patients. It’s gotten wonderful reviews and I’m curious to see how she likes it …

  2. It does seem that many people are struggling with this issue right now…I think the “rush” is drive, and I think we need drive to accomplish what we want in life. But yes, it can take over so much you forget to enjoy things, and that’s not good either. Thanks for the links, and reminder to be mindful.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s